Wasted Spaces


I know it looks like I have abandoned yet another blogging/writing attempt. But I guess I have been too busy focusing my energy on finding a job this past month. So I sort of procrastinated writing for too long. But I’m not abandoning this blog anytime soon. I actually took a trip with my friends last February 12-14  that I’m yet to write a blog post on. I just want to share this first.

Just a while ago, I reopened and reread a planner I bought last year. Well it’s technically a planner but I have always used my planners as notebooks. I wouldn’t say it’s a journal because, to quote Hannah from Girls…


I read the entries and was actually surprised by the things that I’ve written. Yeah, they were mostly the same old whiny, pessimistic shit I usually come up with. My sadness is what has always driven me to write anyway, for as far back as I can remember. But the things I wrote actually took me by surprise because most of them were like quotes, sentences, and even super-short stories that I came up with myself. So I felt pretty good and inspired to write more things like that.

But the thing is, the entries stopped after April 7, 2015. The last things I wrote in it were:

“I think I’m legitimately having a quarter-life crisis breakdown. I don’t even have the energy to write on this anymore.”

Now I feel sad looking at all the empty and wasted pages left. But what’s even sadder is that I felt then that nothing in my life was worth writing about anymore. So I kind of like gave up and put the planner/notebook away along with my thoughts, even if some good things did happen to me last year somehow.

So right now, I’m thinking about writing on the empty spaces nonetheless. I’ll just fill it with words that come to me like I did around this time last year. Maybe that way, I can fill the empty spaces I left behind last year.

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